It’s a no-brainer to me that as a white heterosexual American born man I inherit a lot of privilege in this world. Racism, sexism, imperialism, homophobia are the dominant historical narratives of the planet. Sure, my personal narrative is a small subset of those narratives. But do I have to take on personally and emotionally what is a cultural and institutional inheritance? No.
It’s the difference between being responsible FOR something and being responsible TO something. When another man rapes a woman I am not responsible for that. But I am responsible TO my fellow men to challenge them to become better men and stop rape. Why am I responsible TO them? Because doing so helps grow me, it helps me step into my greatest goodness, it helps me become the man I’ve always wanted to be.
Ultimately, it’s about source motivation and intention. Guilt and shame and fear and anger, which are the unfortunate emotional responses for a lot of men in their interactions with feminists, are not going to motivate anyone very productively for very long. Inviting men to live up to their highest standards, challenging them to be the greatest men they can be, inspiring them with a vision for their lives that will fulfill them as men, will.
In my own small way that’s what I hope to do with my writing.
-Frederick Marx